Sorry for the purely political post, but after noticing, thanks to Catherine, that fuckwad Dubya is about to launch another moronic domestic policy that is once again the exact opposite of what is needed, I had to blow off a little steam by getting silly.

INT. FAMILY THEATER, UNITED STATES WHITE HOUSE - DAY

GW stands at attention in front of a makeshift podium. There is a teleprompter two inches from his face. Since no one but LAURA and TURD BLOSSOM are in attendance, he has been allowed to wear his cheerleader’s outfit and suck on a lollipop.

The scene unfolds.

GW: (reading from teleprompter) My fellow ‘Mericans.

TURD BLOSSOM: That’s Americans, Georgie. Try again.

GW: My fellow ‘Mericans.

LAURA: You know he hates this part.

TURD BLOSSOM: I know, but you would think after nearly six years of training…

GW: Shut up, all right? Jeez. Excuse my French. I can do it.

TURD BLOSSOM: Go ahead.

GW: My fellow ‘Mericans.

TURD BLOSSOM: Georgie… Aaaah…

GW: Ah…

TURD BLOSSOM: Mere….

GW: Mere.

TURD BLOSSOM: Eeeee…

GW: Eeeee.

TURD BLOSSOM: Cans.

GW: (long beat) ‘Mericans.

TURD BLOSSOM: Oh, to hell with it.

GW: Oh, to hell with it.

TURD BLOSSOM: No, I mean, I give up. Just read the damn speech.

GW: Just read the damn speech.

LAURA: It’s okay, baby… You just go right ahead. Don’t listen to mean ol’ Karl.

GW: I need a drink.

LAURA: Mommy will have some milk for you later, smoochie-pooh.

GW: Thanks, mommy.

LAURA: And we’ll pluck your unibrow tomorrow.

TURD BLOSSOM: Hey, that’s my job!

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