I Said I Didn’t Want Any Spam!
31 March 2006 by Stardust
This is a problem that is becoming really irritating to me. I think it’s nervy of people who send religious/political propaganda to others, when they KNOW those people they are sending it to are atheists or others who have differing religious and/or political beliefs, and then to be rude on top of it! I have received these FWDs and such, not from strangers, but from FAMILY MEMBERS. I wonder how they would like it if I were to send atheistic emails to them? How about if I added the sentence that I sometimes find at the bottom of the things I receive… “if you don’t like it YOU JUST SIT DOWN AND SHUT UP”? Or a picture of a cross covered by a red circle with a line through it? Or maybe an article from American Atheist? Or the link to God is for Suckers! I don’t think they would like it very much! The christians in my family get angry and all bent out of shape by me merely telling them to please not send me those kinds of things. If you want to see a christian get really hateful and pissed off, just ask them to please keep their religion to themselves! It doesn’t work with some people to ask nicely; they keep on sending stuff anyway, and I keep on deleting it. My sister has a religious quote from the bible at the end of her emails and even though it is like sticking pins in me when I see it there, I don’t say anything because it is HER email. BUT when I recently put a Native American quote “A rocky vineyard does not need a prayer, but a pick ax.” at the end of mine, she was quite upset because it offended her! I have been tolerant for a long time now, but it’s really starting to piss me off. How do the rest of you handle this stuff with your families and friends?
1 April 2006, on 10:18 pm
I just ignore them as you have been doing. It depends on your relationship with your sister, but if she were *my* sister I’d seriously have to tell her off. Thankfully most of my immediate family share my views on these types of things. Good luck.
1 April 2006, on 10:47 pm
My relatives don’t send my such things, thank Cthulhu. However, my ex-girlfriend’s relatives used to send her right-wing religious crap all the time. She was, when I first met her, extremely uncomfortable with confrontation. However, over time, she grew some confidence.
I saw here grow enormously in this regard during the many protests we attended against the invasion of Iraq. At one massive march, a counter-protester was following us for blocks from the sidewalks screaming “Peace pussies! Peace pussies!”
Finally, my ex turned and yelled “You came from one!” — much to the amusement of the crowd.
So one day she received one of these right-wing, xenophobic, xian emails from her rich Republican aunt… Which was copied to a bunch of friends and relatives. She sat down and spent the better part of the morning composing a measured, point-by-point retort, staying calm throughout. She used third-person language to make it less confrontational, at the same time as making it obvious where she stood (example: “Well, some would argue that blah blah blah.”)
She made sure to copy everyone else who had been CC’d. At the end of her message, she said something akin to “We live in a very diverse world. Be careful what you send out over the Internet to large numbers of people. Not everybody is going to share your opinions.”
In other words, “Stop copying me on this bullshit… I disagree with you. ”
As far as I know, the aunt stopped.
1 April 2006, on 10:50 pm
I’ve just recently copied this. The Atheist Manifesto. I do not get many religious emails but when I do I am sending this back to them. It’s quick and easy to read plus it gives plenty of talking points for the religious to defend with real world facts.
http://www.truthdig.com/dig/item/200512_an_atheist_manifesto
If I get email that proseletyzes then I consider that sufficient for me to send my own info. If for no other reason than to inform the sender of my beliefs.
2 April 2006, on 12:55 am
It depends on your relationship with your sister, but if she were *my* sister I’d seriously have to tell her off.
Lorraine,
My sister and I were always close our whole lives, and I’d like to think we still are. But she got “saved” in the Baptist church and has been going there now for about 4 years and this religion crap has driven a big wedge between us because now she has imposed rules on what I can and cannot talk about, or write about, etc. She has her opinions, but I am not allowed mine. The other relatives I could tell off easier, but this is my sister and I am trying to find a way to talk to her without making things worse. Religion does divide people. Some will try to say that it is atheism that divides, but I don’t see atheist emailing out random forwards, spamming religious folks email boxes with atheist propaganda.
“Stop copying me on this bullshit… I disagree with you. ”
Sean: I have an aunt in North Carolina (my father’s sister) who is one of the worst ones to send me religious and right-wing political crap and I have asked her to stop and even wrote her an email explaining my views and that people have differing views on things and she got HATEFUL…she sent MORE stuff. I even had to block her for awhile! She settled down some, then said she was sorry…and emailed some friendly stuff…then it started up again. Grrrr! I just delete her now but now she is putting god stuff in the subject line so I have to see part of what it is about.
Jimmer: I am going to consider giving the Atheist Manifesto a shot but the way these people are, I seriously doubt they will read beyond the word “atheist.”
2 April 2006, on 1:01 am
In addition to the email forward garbage, I get religious-themed Hallmark cards from family members…”God Bless You on Your Birthday” and then a prayerful message inside. At first I looked at it as ok…they are only wishing me well. But now I see they are on a mission to “save” me.
2 April 2006, on 1:32 am
Well, jeebs, Star. If they are that hardcore, I’d add them to my spam filter and tell them all future email from them was going to my trash bin, and have a nice life. Seriously, it sounds like they are assaulting you and are beyond reason.
2 April 2006, on 8:47 am
I’m so sorry for you, Stardust.
Thankfully I don’t have Xians who get on my nerves, but I had a similar problem with friends in the USA who turned pretty agressive pro-Bushists.
The problem I saw is that they need to confirm their beliefs to themselves (I’m quite convinced that “pro-Bush” is a religious belief, not a rational decision), just like whistling in the woods is necessary to drown out the insecurity. They’re basically still the wonderful people I picked as friends, whose inner self tells them that something is awfully wrong, but who can’t deal with facing their mistakes. So they tell themselves that they’re right and the less that suffices to alleviate their problems, the more they take it to the outside.
I’ve found that the only way to stop the flood is to tell them that they’re believers (in political matters that needs to be pointed out
) and that they should grow a brain and come back when they’re done.
2 April 2006, on 9:35 am
Practically all e-mail that I get is spam, which I delete without even looking at it.
2 April 2006, on 1:29 pm
You do indeed have a tough row to hoe with your relatives and I feel for you. I hope you can work something out with your sister. It’s very sad when this kind of thing happens. I wish you the best.
2 April 2006, on 3:44 pm
Recently, I tried the same approach as Sean’s ex: sening a response - ‘not everyone agrees with you, please think before sending this to everyone’ etc and also made sure to reply all. Not surprisingly, I got a hostile response from my cousin who sent it to me and some of her god gang friends. The best bit was one who said ‘why do you have to hit reply all - we’re not all interested in your views’. Ah, the hypocracy
2 April 2006, on 4:09 pm
Stardust,
You shouldn’t ask people to stop sending you religious crap, you should *tell* them to stop. If they still persist then you should send them stuff making fun of their stupid beliefs. How about the taking the Ghostbusters logo and changing it to “Godbusters” and having the ‘O’ be a crossed out cross and sending that to them. When they reply they don’t like that then tell them they’ll get more unless they stop sending you their stupid primitive backward-assed anti-science crap.
2 April 2006, on 4:57 pm
The best bit was one who said ‘why do you have to hit reply all - we’re not all interested in your views’. Ah, the hypocracy
American in Melbourne,
I did the same thing a couple of times and it made them all irate. They said the same thing, “we’re not all interested in your views.” But apparently they believe I am interested in theirs’! I ticked my aunt off by telling her that I am a liberal in liberal Chicagoland and also that this is a free country and really none of her beeswax what I believed or didn’t believe, and she started sending scripture passages…things got really worse. I had to block her for awhile. I still get the gawd forwards and she sneaks them in as regular emails…copy and pasted poems and stuff. I delete it again and again.I have now as of today deleted her from my email address book and put her on my block list.
if they still persist then you should send them stuff making fun of their stupid beliefs. How about the taking the Ghostbusters logo and changing it to “Godbusters” and having the ‘O’ be a crossed out cross and sending that to them. When they reply they don’t like that then tell them they’ll get more unless they stop sending you their stupid primitive backward-assed anti-science crap.
EoR,
That’s about where it is headed because I am getting sick of it, family or not.
It’s awful when family members get the idea to conspire against you!
2 April 2006, on 11:56 pm
Honestly? I think you should stop being polite, and stop simply deleting their emails. By now it’s pretty obvious that if you ignore it, it’s not going to go away.
Be firm. Tell them you don’t want to receive any more emails of this type, and if they continue to send them, take Sean’s advice and tell them that you will block them indefinitely. If you’re truly sick of it, it’s time to take a stand.
They won’t understand. They’ll act persecuted and discriminated against. Be prepared for the nastiness, and keep a cool, calm and direct manner in your responses.
I know you say you want to believe that you can get the relationship that you once had with your sister back, but really. Four years? I think it’s time to let that ship sail, don’t you? If she realizes the error of her ways some day, she’ll contact you.
3 April 2006, on 2:42 pm
star, I’m sorry to hear of the “campaign” against you; most of my family members are pretty laid-back in their various religious beliefs, and more than happy to live and let live, so I don’t have to deal with the shit you’ve been putting up with.
I think Julie has some good advice, although I know the part about laying down the law with your sister would be really tough for me to do. I have two sisters that I love, and it would hurt me no end to have to limit my communication with them to basically just birthdays; on the other hand, each one of us has a natural right to put herself first in her own life, so despite the guilt that would naturally raise its ugly head, you have to do what’s best for *you.*
3 April 2006, on 4:43 pm
EoR: That’s a good idea
Perhaps combining it with an auto-reply (only for the spammers, of course): “Stardust is unable to bear any more of your salespitch. She’s off to http://www.gods4suckers.net to get a break, you might catch her and an earful there.”
Eve: I’ve broken up with my former sister almost 20 years ago, because I found out the hard way that for some people genetics is an excuse to suck you dry - of emotions, of money and of more worthwhile social contacts. Once I was past the conditioning, I learned that family is a sad compromise compared to true friendship.
3 April 2006, on 6:03 pm
“Stardust is unable to bear any more of your salespitch. She’s off to http://www.gods4suckers.net to get a break, you might catch her and an earful there.”
That one is great! LOL!
Thanks everyone for your help on this matter…I have decided to stop being polite. It will never end if I just keep allowing this to go on. I have tried the nice route…not it’s time for bluntness and just speaking out firmly. For those who don’t stop, I going to have a nice auto response ready. Sam Harris Atheist Manifesto as jimmer suggested. If they do like it, to bad. They will either scratch and get over it, or just leave me alone. I wish they would just respect me, but that ain’t gonna happen…so they are forcing me to it.
3 April 2006, on 6:04 pm
I meant to write if the DON’T like it…too bad…(it’s been a long day)
3 April 2006, on 7:17 pm
Annegrete: Once I was past the conditioning, I learned that family is a sad compromise compared to true friendship.
Too true; I’m sorry that had to happen to you, but it sounds like you made the right decision.
star: You go, girl! It’s one of the first steps toward cussy, crotchety,curmudgeonly old lady- and manhood we talked about!
3 April 2006, on 10:47 pm
“Once I was past the conditioning, I learned that family is a sad compromise compared to true friendship”
Well said Annegrete, slightly more similar DNA doesn’t amount to anything and too many people use family as an excuse for crap.
Stardust,
Maybe someone here with some artistic talent can get the Ghostbusters logo and modify it as I suggested. I can come up with some words though:
There’s a jeebus freak in your neighborhood, who ya gonna call ?
GODBUSTERS !
There’s some religious crap and it don’t look good, who ya gonna call ?
GODBUSTERS !
I ain’t afraid of no gods
I ain’t afraid of no gods
There’s an invisible man yakkin’ in your head, who ya gonna call ?
GODBUSTERS !
You’re praying every night before you goto bed, who ya gonna call ?
GODBUSTERS !
I ain’t afraid of no gods
I ain’t afraid of no gods
Who ya gonna call ?
GODBUSTERS !
If you’re all alone pick up the phone and call
GODBUSTERS !
I ain’t afraid of no gods
I hear they’re scared of girls
I ain’t afraid of no gods
Who ya gonna call ?
GODBUSTERS !
If you’ve had a dose of a fanatic god baby, you better call
GODBUSTERS !
Godbustin’ makes me feel good
I ain’t afraid of no gods
GODBUSTERS !
Who ya gonna call ?
GODBUSTERS !!
Who ya gonna call ?
GODBUSTERS !!!
3 April 2006, on 10:55 pm
I’m 30 years old. My Grandfather is still alive and sends me and my family this kind of crap all the time. I’ve ignored it for over a year now. I knew we should never have gotten him a computer and email.
He’s old, and he’s from a different generation. I’m afraid he’ll get so worked up he’ll have a heart attack or something even if I asked him nicely not to send that stuff any more.
I suppose we should just keep ignoring it, but if anyone has any suggestions for this scenario, I’d love to hear them! Thanks!
4 April 2006, on 7:01 pm
Pete -
That is a hard one when they are old and feeble. I’m really glad that my parents aren’t ones that do this kind of stuff to me. My mother lets a gawd forward slip through once in awhile, but I see that it is forwarded to everyone on her list and she doesn’t always remember to take my name off. I can let that slide. Weird that I get NO PROBLEM from my parents, but like I have said before…they are twice-a-year xians of the German Lutheran variety and really don’t give a hoot what people believe or don’t believe.(My sister’s daughter and son-in-law say my parents are not “true” xians — and they are probably right, thank goodness!) They are 78 and 69 so I would not want to upset them either even if they were part of all this.
It’s other younger people in my family who bother me…especially my sister’s branch of the family, my youngest brother and my aunts and uncles down south AND my used-to-be best friend who recently was divorced and lives in Tucson now. I have told her rather bluntly and it made her worse. So she is blocked now…I have implemeted my plan as stated above and am waiting for the phone to start ringing!
4 April 2006, on 7:02 pm
EoR - Great Lyrics!
I worked as a graphic artist for a couple of decades so I could probably whip something up. Great Idea! Thanks!
4 April 2006, on 7:06 pm
star, I like your response to Pete; it’s tough when you’re dealing with much older,frail people on any issue, and I guess it just depends on what kind of a relationship you have with them what kinds of conversations you can have. I’m lucky with my parents, too.
20 November 2006, on 7:45 pm
Let’s try this…
How many of you can define your reality so well that you can explain the complexity of all that exists the # of stars, the fact that the power of an atomic bomb is being contained on a subatomic omolecule throughout the atoms and molecules well spread throughout our universe, or the fact of how well placed our planet is in the solar system. Try to explain away the fact of big bang or whatever? But I hope you all know that MY worldview is made of
Proseltyzing continues…
Threats of hellfire and damnation.
real guy…read COMMENT POLICY BEFORE COMMENTING.
And why are you xians so chicken shit to hide in the archives?