We Win the Banana!
12 May 2006 by Lya KahloRemember this gem of creationist stupidity from Ray Comfort and Mike Seaver . . . uh, Kirk Cameron?
Well, It’s dead
Hellbound Alleee : I’m just saying that, that there are very few plants, and we argue – with some environmentalists a lot who don’t believe in bioengineered food, because all, because most of the food that we eat of course is farmed, and is done through horticulture, and we’ve engineered these – these fruits and vegetables to be more tasty to us. So actually, the banana seems to be not, not made by God at this point, it’s more like um… what, what came first, the banana or the hand ? [laugh] You know ? Man took the banana and made it better for man…
Ray Comfort : Okay, you’ve got that one. You can have the banana.
Francois Tremblay : WE WIN ! WE WIN ! WE’VE WON THE BANANA !
12 May 2006, on 12:46 pm
Thanks, Lya; I really needed a chuckle!
12 May 2006, on 5:42 pm
bwahaaha see weve won one we beat them now the evil athiest conspriacy can rule the earth
12 May 2006, on 5:49 pm
So much for the “atheist’s nightmare”. I wonder what they’ll try next. He should be embarrassed with himself.
12 May 2006, on 5:51 pm
This reminds me so much of the sermon I heard a pastor give once comparing gawd to an oreo cookie.
12 May 2006, on 6:04 pm
How does that work, stardust? He has a gooey centre?
12 May 2006, on 6:16 pm
I dunno, but I thought it was hilarious when Stephen Colbert welcomed Mayor Nagin to “Washington D.C.: the chocolate city with a marshmellow center.”
12 May 2006, on 7:25 pm
“This reminds me so much of the sermon I heard a pastor give once comparing gawd to an oreo cookie.”
The best way to approach God is to pry him apart, lick out the middle, and then dunk his pieces in milk.
12 May 2006, on 8:31 pm
How does that work, stardust? He has a gooey centre?
Well, There are three parts…father, son, and holy ghost.
The father and the son are the two hard chocolatey ends that go together to bring us the good stuff…the holy ghost goodness of the sweet, creamy white filling of everlasing life in heavenly deliciousness. He actually brought an oreo cookie in as a prop.
12 May 2006, on 9:55 pm
Hey Guys,
I supposed to post this comment in Sean’s post “A people without a creation myth” but it did not work, so I pasted it here.
Yes, I admit that there are xian(?) groups who forcibly convert people to christianity, but it’s not the case with everyone doing evangelism. Don’t generalize the work of mission. If there were individuals who are “over zealous” of their conviction, it’s unfair to use them as basis of your judgment of the total work of christian mission. It’s like saying that every atheist is a communist since unbelief in God is one of its tenet.
BTW, the heart of our Gospel is John 3:16. Therein is found our expectation, anticipation and principle for people’s response to the love of God: “whosoever believeth”. We are not forcing people to accept the Gospel, and we must not! We believe, allow and promote individual volition and conviction. Every christian doing evangelism must know that. And anyone who went beyond this biblical principle must be corrected. They must not be used instead to be the basis of understanding the total missionary program of Jesus Christ which He gave to His disciples and the Church.
Eve & everyone:
If you thought your conversion to Christ is significant to us, you are right. We value your life, your soul. But if you thought we are forcing you, you are wrong. You’re not that significant! There are a lot of people who are needing the Gospel and be saved. You don’t know me; I don’t know you and we have not met in person. How could I control you after you accept the Gospel of salvation? You’re blinded through with an erroneous assumption.
13 May 2006, on 12:36 am
Guys:
Of this post, I would say that I really appreciate your scientific genius. You almost know everything and explained everything scientifically. Well, I’m almost convinced that everything in this life is just mere chemical reactions. Man was able to make banana better for man -but, can any man able to make banana out of his scientific and chemical knowledge? You know that “monkey’s big brothers”(of course the atheists) have already run out of banana supply, don’t you? Can you please create some? When I say create, I don’t mean plant.
Ed.: Rolie’s comments are just incoherent nuttiness. Who thinks they should just be blacklisted?
13 May 2006, on 12:52 am
The website godlessbastard.com has a funny and stupid answer to this banana as the athiest nightmare. I do not know how to link it to here.
Go into the website menu and click on Got Logic? This is located in the Manifesto column, fourth from the bottom. It is well worth the read and I caution those that go there not to drink while reading this rebuttal.
13 May 2006, on 11:42 am
Rolie
Give us 100 years or maybe less and we will. We will create one.
14 May 2006, on 2:40 am
Human beings create something out of nothing everyday. It’s called thinking. Not only that, we are able to take something as intangible as as a thought and turn it into something tangible. At the turn of the century we were stil riding around in horses and carriages. Now just about every household in America has an automobile. The automobile is the product of a thought who’s thinker then went on to bring into reality. “God” is not doing anything new or wondrous he/she/it/they/whatever just does it more mythically.
Anyway Christians complain that we make them look stupid, however, anyone reading that transcript can see that they do it to themselves.
14 May 2006, on 3:20 pm
“Anyway Christians complain that we make them look stupid, however, anyone reading that transcript can see that they do it to themselves.”
And we get a lot of help from Rolie and BattleCry and Jared Subway and Tribalogue and Frank Walton and Pat Robertson and Falwell and Neo cons and George Bush and . .. well, you get the picture.
14 May 2006, on 8:48 pm
Jimmer said:
“Rolie
Give us 100 years or maybe less and we will. We will create one.”
Hahaha! That is, if you could overcome your physical frailty my friend. I hope then that you could also discover the solution of your mortality problem!!!
15 May 2006, on 12:26 am
FYI, I have banned Rolie Acot (again). Here is his (her, its, Sable Chicken’s socket puppet’s?) last comment:
Jimmer said:
“Rolie
Give us 100 years or maybe less and we will. We will create one.”
Hahaha! That is, if you could overcome your physical frailty my friend. I hope then that you could also discover the solution of your mortality problem!!!
Again, missed the entire point. Kind of funny. Seems to have thought Jimmer literally meant he would be the one in 100 years to come up with an artificial banana. Jimmer: keep taking your vitamins, man. That’s a hell of a goal!
15 May 2006, on 1:22 pm
If rolie’s still lurking:
I don’t care what you believe about me. Yes, I’m angry at theists, especially xians right now. Yes, I’m lumping you in with the rest of your brethren. Clean up your own house before you come here pointing out the specks of dust in mine. You guys can’t even prove your god exists scientifically, let alone which denomination is the “right” one, and you want to take “missions” to the “unsaved” world? Please, don’t make me laugh.
And don’t put words in my mouth: I didn’t say you would try to control me once I “accept the gospel of salvation.” I said you would try it if I *refused.* Look around you. The religious wrong in this country wants everyone to follow their rules based on their religion (which you claim is yours as well) whether we agree with you or not. You should be fighting them if you believe they’re wrong instead of wasting your time coming here with your inanity.
Like I said, clean up your own house first. I don’t believe a word you say. Almost every fundie-leaning xian who’s come on here has been a liar and a cheat – so take up my “erroneous assumptions” with your siblings in christ who have contributed to them.
15 May 2006, on 1:37 pm
“Almost every fundie-leaning xian who’s come on here has been a liar and a cheat ”
Okay class, what does that tell us about this religion, and perhaps even all religions by extention?
To quote Voltaire: “The first priest was the first scoundrel to meet the first fool.”
It makes sense that they would produce followers who are simultaneously scoundrels and fools.
15 May 2006, on 3:14 pm
Eve said: And don’t put words in my mouth: I didn’t say you would try to control me once I “accept the gospel of salvation.” I said you would try it if I *refused.*
Since unlike many theists, I actually try to practice what I preach, here’s what I actually wrote on the “People without a Creation Myth” post: “John Nolan/Jared and rolie, like all the people in these two posts, are liars and cheats who just want to brainwash me so that they can control my life absolutely. They both know damn well that if they can’t convert me, they’ll try to force me to live according to their rules anyway.”
15 May 2006, on 10:10 pm
I’m 51 and in better shape and health than my nearly 90 year old parents were at this age. I fully expect to live well past 100 years and in good health. I’ve almost permanently eliminated that mind virus that says I’m guilty of something. Without guilt there is no fear, there is no paranoia. There is only freedom and I choose freedom over sevitude and slavery.
That Rolie??? I made a very simple statement and it went right on by. sheesh. We means more than one. We will create one. Maybe I should have asked. Would you like that in blue or orange?
Oh and Sean. When we do create one it will be real and not artificial. That is what creating is all about.
I’ve said this before. One of my professors at the University. In responce to “what is agriculture”? “Agriculture is the study of growing two blades of grass where one did grow before”. Today those words are made true. In fact more than 2 are now growing there. We did not pray them into place either. We,in this specific instance, did not include me. I was stating it as a meta position of all science through time. I myself am no longer in agriculture. But I do read up on it. I should also state that we can mean, we human beings. We humans in pursuit of better living, better lives,just better is good enough. We do not seek perfection as that is the fantasy realm of the mentally ill. With the exception that we agree that good enough is perfect. I guess what I’m saying is that we are making things better continuously in small steps. We are not trying for perfection but we are trying to achieve better, repeatedly. I think it is Kaizen never-ending improvements.
16 May 2006, on 7:26 am
Yeah, I understand that you meant creating a real one from scratch. I guess calling it artificial was a way of clarifiying the reproductive method. Like you make one that can pop into existence fully formed, without having to be planted and grow. But it is still a real banana.
Um… What the heck am I babbling about?
5 July 2006, on 8:59 pm
For what shall it profit a man to ‘win the banana’ and lose his soul?
So the banana argument wasn’t perfect… God is, and you’re not – you still have to face Him on Judgement day.
~ brandt
6 July 2006, on 12:41 am
Brandt Says:
For what shall it profit a man to ‘win the banana’ and lose his soul?
So the banana argument wasn’t perfect…
No, Brandt, it was idiotic.
God is
Prove it. Give one shred of proof of his existence other than your pathology.
and you’re not
Granted. Never said we were. That’s the beauty of living without self-righteous religion. We don’t go about saying sick things like this:
you still have to face Him on Judgement day.
Your mind has been infected by a virus called religion, Brandt. I hope you find the cure one day.
24 September 2006, on 2:36 am
I’m watching “The Way Of The Master” atheist banana episode right now. Don’t like bananas? Consider the following:
Either the universe did always exist or the universe did not always exist. If the universe always existed, then it would have reached energy death according to “Heat And You” (see below) an infinite time ago, an absurdity given the universe’s present state. If the universe didn’t always exist, then either the universe created itself or the universe didn’t create itself. If the universe created itself, then the universe would have existed before it existed, an absurdity. Therefore the universe didn’t always exist and didn’t create itself. Therefore an uncreated entity not subject to “Heat And You” created the universe. That uncreated entity is God.
“Heat and You”! The three laws of heat:
In scientific terms:
(1) The increase in the energy of a closed system is equal to the amount of energy added to the system by heating, minus the amount lost in the form of work done by the system on its surroundings.
(2) The total entropy of any isolated thermodynamic system tends to increase over time, approaching a maximum value.
(3) As a system asymptotically approaches absolute zero of temperature all processes virtually cease and the entropy of the system asymptotically approaches a minimum value.
In darkly humorous form:
(1) You can’t win; the best you can do is break even.
(2) You can only break even at absolute zero.
(3) You can’t reach absolute zero.
In Joe Q. Public speak:
(1) There’s no free lunch nowadays.
(2) Even paid lunches rot.
(3) The only lunch that couldn’t and didn’t rot was the free one at the beginning.
Contrast these laws with evolution:
In darkly humorous form:
(1) You can’t help but win.
(2) Who cares about breaking even?
(3) Anything is possible.
In Joe Q. Public speak:
(1) Lunches don’t cost anything nowadays.
(2) Who cares about paying?
(3) Money for nothing and the chicks for free (or so Dire Straits said in 1985).
The science of heat has been so well established that it hasn’t had any research for at least 65 years. Yet endless research into evolution continues, even though it conflicts with the science of heat. Hmm.