Day of Appreciation and Love
21 November 2006 by Stardust
This may be a bit “gushy” for this site, but since many of us are going to be spending Thanksgiving with religious members of our families, and will all have to endure the “saying of grace” and all that other oogey-boogey religious crapola, I just wanted to express that atheists are thankful (though we may hide in the basement during prayer time.) The big difference between atheists and believers is that atheists are thankful to real flesh and blood human beings who make our lives a bit better during our “brief moment in time.”
(originally published HERE on Nov. 23, 2005)
Although I have no religious beliefs, I still am very thankful for the many good things in my life. Who am I thankful to? My thanks and appreciation goes to my dear husband for getting up at 4 a.m. every day to drive over an hour to a job where he works hard all day long to provide for his family. I am thankful to him for his love and committment for more than thirty years of marriage. I thank him for being a loving and helpful father to his three children. I am thankful to my children for their love and the joy they bring into my life. I am thankful to my parents for giving me life. I am thankful to them for raising me and loving me even when I was not very loveable. I am thankful to my doctors for taking care of my health and doing all they can to cure my illnesses, and keep me and my family healthy. I am thankful to the truck driver who hauls my food to the stores where I shop, I am thankful to the farmer who grows and harvests the food. I am thankful to the inventors of all of our modern technology that makes my life so comfortable and convenient. I am thankful to our police officers and soldiers for protecting us. I am thankful to NASA to take us to worlds we cannot see from where we are. I am thankful to the teachers, the explorers, researchers, scientists and others who provide us with information we need to enhance our lives. I am thankful for the entertainers, writers, film makers, artists, musicians, actors, etc. who bring some joy and imagination to our lives. These are the ones to who I owe my thanks.
Thanksgiving is a day to get together with those we appreciate and love and to celebrate that love and appreciation we have for each other. I wish everyone, no matter what your beliefs are, a very happy Thanksgiving Day with all of those who matter most to you, whether there in person or far away but close in heart.
Happy Turkey Day everyone! Hang in there with the relatives!
Addition: A similar theme by Ron from earlier T-days here at GifS:
Thanksgiving and reflective appreciation
21 November 2006, on 9:58 am
Thank you Stardust for saying it so well! Happy Thanksgiving to you and your loved ones - even the ones praying over the food!
21 November 2006, on 10:34 am
Well-said, Stardust.
I have to say, My wife makes us say grace at thanksgiving, but never at any other time. She went to Catholic School as a teenager, so I suspect it’s just that last little bit of indoctrination that she can’t quite shake off, or she feels she has to do it for others at the table, still can’t figure out why. I don’t say anything about it, because I don’t need another argument ;). But she never goes to church (not in the 12+ years we’ve known each other), doesn’t read religious books (just trashy romance novels), doesn’t watch religious shows (except for Seventh Heaven for a while). So I really don’t get why one day a year, for about 15 seconds, she has an “episode”.
21 November 2006, on 12:16 pm
Yep, I’m thankful that my ancestors made it to a continent where I am able to enjoy a standard of living far above that of the majority of the world’s 6 billion humans. When I think about the impoverished millions who have virtually nothing for which to be thankful I realize just how uncaring is the universe.
I’m not hiding in any basement while someone says a prayer. Nor will I bow my head and pretend I’m okay with giving thanks to an imaginary being, especially one with the reputation of most invisible sky daddies.
Good luck, all of you, who are faced with enduring the family traditions.
21 November 2006, on 12:29 pm
It may have been that Adult Imaginary Friend they were thanking at that first Thanksgiving but it could just as well have been- ought to have been, in fact, those Native Americans who opted not to let the pilgrims starve, a fateful decision in retrospect because, boy, did the white man have a funny way of showing his gratitude. Small tokens of his appreciation like warm, woolen, blankets trimmed with smallpox, cute, little balls of lead delivered at high rates of speed, a brand new god to make you feel unworthy and underdressed, and the apparent insanity of fencing in and claiming ownership of land that belonged to everybody. The moral of the story; Greeks be damned, beware of white men bearing gifts.
Odd, that the respect and tolerance of others that was, apparently, too much to ask of the xians of that day, remains out of the question for our modern-day throwbacks as well. I mean, fess up, if you caught one of those empty, xian
fish outlines at your local crawdad hole, would you throw it back- or would you toss it in the skillet, not to eat, but just to watch it sizzle and pop(I’ll take “run away screaming” as an equally valid answer.)?
I’m thankful to my family that loves me despite my admittedly crusty and contrarian attitude towards pretty much everything they believe in.
I’m thankful to my tremendously zen, 130lb. black labrador- who’s “Waldo” online but “Raven” in real life, for failing out of guide dog school and being available for adoption when I went looking.
I’m thankful to that ravishing homage to feminine pulchritude- that I call “Grace” for much the same reason as the giant bouncer is “Tiny”- who, despite the universe of options available to her, has chosen the route of a lifetime membership in that “Bitter, Unrecognized Genius” support group and, to my daily surprise, voluntarily takes her clothes off in front of me and shares my bed.(Hey, honey, I think I’ve just written my vows!)
I’m cautiously thankful to the American voter for refusing to have that Repiglickin’ sand kicked in their faces yet again. I’m thankful that Rick Santorum is just a Dan Savage euphemism and no longer a Senator. I’m thankful that J. Kenneth Blackwell and his fundie entourage were sent packing. I’m thankful that George “The Pride of the Confederacy” Allen bit the dust. I’m thankful to Ted Haggard for his little “Meth and Man Ass” schtick. I’m thankful to Ned Lamont for showing us what a self-serving and irrelevant piece fo shit Joe Lieberman is.
I’m gleefully thankful to the AARP moderate xians that are trying to make me the Thomas Kinkade of scherenschnitte and for their not noticing the pagan and occult imagery I tend to incorporate into my otherwise quaint and wholesome designs. I’m also thankful that I live in this day and age because, a thousand years ago, I’d have been hunched over vellum illuminating Kells-ish manuscripts in a frigid, candlelit monastery, tubercular, and gradually losing my eyesight.
I’m extra thankful to my Mom who indulges that sliver of a feminine-side of my otherwise overwhelming manliness- my rather militant Imelda Marcos-esque love of boots, with a new pair of Timberlands whenever she happens to see an elusive pair of size 14s.
Finally, I’m thankful to GIfS, for the opportunity to have known Sean for the short time I did, for he and Ron keeping the treehouse functional for us to play in, for all the other mods and commenters who make it such fun to participate, and to the occasional fundie infestation that’s drawn to any picnic involving food for thought.
Happy Thanksgiving all.
21 November 2006, on 1:13 pm
Yes, Stardust…
As per your usual…nicely expressed.
Happy Turkey Day to you, and all our GifSters.
Speaking of Turkeys…say what?…Stardusts pointed words of gratitude…and particularly, Revenant’s comment about saying Grace, reminds me of one of my old pet peaves regarding the subject of saying ‘Grace’.
Let’s see…
[Catholic:] “Bless us, oh Lawd, and these thy gifts, which we are about to receive; from thy bounty, through Crass our Lawd…Amen!”
Or, make that…Awomen…Apersons…Ahfuck?
OK; Pardon some descriptive complexities:
I’m reminded that the story of the ‘Foist’ Thanksgiving entails the sharing a meal between:
1)The Fundie-“I’m here to rip off your native land”…White Pilgrims…and
2)The Non-white, Heathen, “Thanks for bringing all those diseases, you lying, selfish fucks!”…Native Indians’.
Now, it’s always been curious to me that the gratitude expressed by all the, shall we say…NON native types…is to thank the Invisible Sky Daddy for all the goodies on the menu.
In contrast…the ‘Heathen’ Natives…would honor the sacrifice of the turkey [the one whose carcass waits to be scarfed down!] AND perhaps, even those whose labors were responsible for growing, gathering,…stuffing…and yes…even COOKING the meal.
Bottom line?…Imaginary Sky Daddy doesn’t even raise a non-existent finger; or exert any blood sacrifice, or even one iota of energy, whatsoever, and gets ALL the credit…and pious, thankful praise!
“Oh, Jeebus…could you please check the oven temperature…and the sweet potatoes?”
Yeaaaah!…soooOOO…TYPICAL of lame-ass Religions!
Of course, to be fair [?]…no virgins will be sacrificed!
Or…WILL they???
[Hmmm…did I hear some moaning in the kitchen?…
Let’s go check!]
21 November 2006, on 1:37 pm
Beautifully expressed, everyone, and have a Happy Turkey Day!
21 November 2006, on 1:46 pm
Personally, I’m thankful for humor, GIFS, Pharyngula, P.Z. Myers, and his good taste in links:
(In which we follow J. Safran as he brings the word of atheism to the Mormons. Hallelujah!)
21 November 2006, on 2:19 pm
Very nice, Stardust.
A similar theme from earlier T-days here at GifS:
Thanksgiving and reflective appreciation
21 November 2006, on 5:20 pm
Revenant - I am glad that my immediate family are all atheists (my hubby and I, and our three kids and future daughter-in-law). It’s good though that the prayer thing is only once a year for you…when we have extended family gatherings “Grace” shows up each and every time!
RDZ said:I’m thankful to GIfS, for the opportunity to have known Sean for the short time I did, for he and Ron keeping the treehouse functional for us to play in, for all the other mods and commenters who make it such fun to participate, and to the occasional fundie infestation that’s drawn to any picnic involving food for thought.
Ramen RDZ! - Great comment and worthy of a post of its own.
Ron said: Lots of people take the opportunity to give literal thanks to their own flavor of imaginary friend; but the generic heart of the idea of thankfulness for the good things in your life seems pretty independent of whether you think that there’s anybody or thing to whom thanks are due.
Well said Ron (in the post you linked to), and thanks for the link. I think I am going to add that link to my above post.
21 November 2006, on 5:39 pm
We already had our Thanksgiving last month. I’m always thankful for the wonderful people in my life. Unfortunately, this Thanksgiving, the down-South part of my family is not going to be experiencing a very nice holiday. Over the weekend, my cousin died. A lovely 19 year old girl, who suddenly succumbed to an undiagnosed blood clot. Her funeral is tomorrow. I’m so sorry I can’t go, as I know everyone is hurting terribly. So, up here, we are going to have a mini-Thanksgiving just to celebrate our thanks at having been able to know and love this wonderful girl, even if our time together was so short.
21 November 2006, on 6:40 pm
Stardust and Ron
Both of your posts are truly meaningful to me. I have really adopted thanksgiving as a good day to reflect and be conscious of the good in my life.
Audrey
I am sorry to hear about your cousin.
Here is something I was tuned to by PZ at Pharyngula. I will be posting later this week about it. Until then enjoy. Scientists talk about science and not god. Fantastic.
http://beyondbelief2006.org/
21 November 2006, on 6:43 pm
I am thankful that I am not the a**hole who wrote this commentary in the CSMonitor:
http://www.csmonitor.com/2006/1121/p09s01-coop.html?s=t5
21 November 2006, on 8:53 pm
I am thankful for the great blowjobs I’ve recieved this year
21 November 2006, on 9:59 pm
A Thanksgiving joke (of sorts):
“What did the turkey say as he was led to the chopping block?”
“What?”
“I’m chicken!”
Ta-dump.
Have a great Thanksgiving fellow GiFSers! I thankful I found you!
22 November 2006, on 12:09 am
Dear Stardust,
That was beautiful. I hope you are in good health and not currently seeing your doctor.
Happy Thanksgiving to all the Americans that post here plus their friends and family.
I am thankful for many things but top of my list today, is that my mum’s specialist has said he is happy with her platelet and white blood cell counts. (Got the news 3 hours ago)
In my top 10 thankful things, is sharing my atheism with others on this site. Being challenged by you all and made to think. Also for the friendship you have shown me.
I am thankful for my gorgeous, darling husband, wonderful family and friends. Also my delightful, sweet daughter.
22 November 2006, on 1:07 am
I am thankful for many things but top of my list today, is that my mum’s specialist has said he is happy with her platelet and white blood cell counts. (Got the news 3 hours ago)
Anne - That is indeed something to be extremely thankful to your doctors for! I wish continually improving health for your dear mother.
That was beautiful. I hope you are in good health and not currently seeing your doctor.
Thanks Anne, I have lived at the doctor’s office and hospitals pretty much my whole life. But it’s really no big deal to me. It’s just how it is. I have some medical problems that are kept under control pretty much with medications…I have had Rheumatoid Arthritis since my early 30s (it’s gotten gradually worse, but is manageable), I have been a severe asthmatic all my life but know how to deal with that too (modern medicines like Singular have helped tremendously), and have recently developed a heart problem caused by the RA and am now on heart medicine to regulate that and it’s been working out well (though it can be a bit scary at times). I have had other problems too, BUT…my problems are tiny compared to many other people in the world. Many people have it so much worse. And, as Lynda pointed out above, I am forturnate to have been born into a country with a “standard of living far above that of the majority of the world’s 6 billion humans” and can get the medical treatments I need and have insurance to cover most of the expense. There are too many people even in our own country, and even on this website who aren’t as fortunate as I have been.
All I can say is that I am thankful to have a great bunch of doctors, advanced medications and treatments, good health insurance to pay for most of it, and a family who helps me a lot.
22 November 2006, on 5:15 am
Thanks Stardust for sharing. I am so sorry that you have had so much bad luck with your health. Your energy and attitude is so inspiring. I feel very humbled you are sharing your health with us.
I will also be thankful for living in a wealthy country with great weather and grateful for good health.
My mother’s specialist is in my top 20 awesome people. (My husband, daughter and mum are equal number 1).
Stardust I will embarass you and say with your story and the way you have taught your kids independent and critical thinking you are in my top 20. (Not sure which number)
22 November 2006, on 9:33 am
awww, shucks Anne, *blush*
22 November 2006, on 9:52 am
Hey guys, I have a story that is a bit off topic, but not really since it involves being trapped with relatives. This was pretty much the most annoying thing I have had happen to me in awhile.
I went on a little trip with my sister to another town to see the play Mama Mia. Her boyfriend is a manager for a production company that handles theater productions all over the country, so he got us tickets for it. We stayed at the hotel he was at, and we went to dinner with him, which required riding in his car. He is a divorced Baptist fundie (my sister is the one with the Baptist pastor wannabe son-in-law who whisked his family off to an Alaskan island for Jeebus.) Anyway, we were riding in his car to the restaurant and he BLASTED JEEBUS MUSIC the whole entire time (to and from)! The music was country-western style (which I also can’t stand), but the lyrics sounded very much like romantic love songs, making it sound as if the man who was singing the songs lusted after gawd and wanted to have homosexual relations with Jeebus. Anyway, I was like WTF???
He KNOWS I am an atheist, he knows I would hate it and would be pissed off…yet he played it anyway — and loudly. I had asked for him to turn it down a bit since I was in the backseat and it was blasting right behind my head. He turned it down a “hair”. For the sake of keeping the weekend civil, I bit my tongue, though I was seething!
This just goes to show how much atheists are MUCH more tolerant than xians. If it had been the other way around, and I had blasted Bad Religion in their ears, they would have been highly offended and probably would have ordered me to turn it off. My sister has left my brother’s house early from gatherings there because she has been offended by his metal music.
So, I am going to have to think of a way to confront my sister about being mutually respectful…but after the holidays so the atheist doesn’t get accused of messing up the family holiday season. And this all does come down to many xian’s lack of respect for the atheist or people who are different.
22 November 2006, on 12:10 pm
Thanks, everyone. I’ve enjoyed reading your stories. I’m not too worried about Thanksgiving, but I always get antsy around Christmas. We just call it Roman Census Day. (Perhaps that’s not as funny to other people? hm…)
I found out yesterday that my four-year-old son needs to have some more tests run, to check his renal function and the like. Previous tests made the doctor nervous and she feels he should get a full spectrum of blood/urine/kidney tests. Something about post-strep infections doing damage to the kidney. She says it’s probably nothing to worry about, but wants to investigate fully, just in case. Great news to have during the holidays!!
However, I am thankful that, as far as I can tell, both of my kids are healthy and well. They’re smart little atheists. They’re happy. I’m thankful that I’m not raising them in Chad or Sudan or the Eastern Bloc countries. I’m thankful that my husband can be a stay-at-home dad so they don’t have to go to xian daycare like I did. (Horrid places.) I’m thankful that he’s an atheist (sci-pantheist). I’m thankful for GIfS because I can come here and vent without worrying about a backlash, and I know this is the one place where those thoughts are safe.
Whether you’re eating a tofurkey, turducken, fried turkey or baked; I hope you all stay healthy (as much as possible) and happy all the way through Roman Census Day. (Then, let’em have it for all of the holiday shit they put you through!)
22 November 2006, on 12:38 pm
Just to add a little levity:
Kryten: Don’t you believe that God exists in all things? Aren’t you a Pantheist?
Lister: Yeah, I just don’t think it applies to kitchen utensils. I’m not a Fryingpantheist.
— Dave Lister, Red Dwarf: The Last Day
22 November 2006, on 12:39 pm
I think the one thing I miss about the old site layout was the comment preview. Helps me see my HTML mistakes more easily so they can be rectified before committing them.
22 November 2006, on 12:42 pm
I found out yesterday that my four-year-old son needs to have some more tests run, to check his renal function and the like. Previous tests made the doctor nervous and she feels he should get a full spectrum of blood/urine/kidney tests. Something about post-strep infections doing damage to the kidney. She says it’s probably nothing to worry about, but wants to investigate fully, just in case.
Bean, it’s good you have a doctor who is thorough and on top of things. She is right that it is probably nothing to worry about, but need to be 100% certain about it. Being a mother myself, I know that saying not to worry isn’t going to make you stop worrying…but hang in there. These things usually turn out to be nothing.
22 November 2006, on 2:52 pm
Why bother with Thanksgiving? Whatever you make out of it, it’s a Christian tradition. You don’t celebrate Easter now do ya?
22 November 2006, on 3:29 pm
Why bother with Thanksgiving? Whatever you make out of it, it’s a Christian tradition. You don’t celebrate Easter now do ya?
Skribb - Well,…when the majority of our family members are xians, we are expected at the family gatherings and though they are xians, we love them…and they love us, so we show up and endure it. Though we are atheists, we can still show appreciation for those people and things in our lives that are good.
Easter, on the other hand is celebrating the mythological zombie-like resurrection of Jeebus…so that to me is way different.
22 November 2006, on 4:39 pm
Dear Bean,
I hope all is well with your son.
Please keep us all posted when you get the test results.
We are so fortunate to live in countries with wonderful doctors.
22 November 2006, on 8:48 pm
The amazing thing about my son’s doctor is that she is from Vietnam, so I am just glad she came to this country to begin with.
Revenant!! That’s absolutely the best lines from Red Dwarf. I’m glad to find someone else who knows what it is!
Most xian holidays began as pagan/earth-based holidays. So, technically, most xians shouldn’t be celebrating them. They were often commandeered by the Vatican and the names were changed to make it easier to convert the “heathens” - “Yes, we will still celebrate in the spring, only now it’s called it something else.” However, as I am not a xian or pagan, my family celebrate the rebirth that spring represents for the earth. So, we don’t celebrate Easter, per se, though throughout history, you can find that it meant many things to many people. Thanksgiving, on the other hand, is not a religious holiday. Perhaps the people who started it were xians, but that shouldn’t keep us from being thankful to and for the people in our lives. It certainly isn’t mandated by the Pope or practiced by xians all over the world.
Just my two cents; assuredly there will be disagreement - such is life. I just like that my husband can cook a nice meal for my parents and they aren’t suggesting we go out to eat instead. (That being the norm because my mom loves to eat out and can afford it…I prefer home cooked meals, and my husband is practically a gourmet!)
22 November 2006, on 8:57 pm
Just to give everyone a laugh in the pre-War on Christmas!
http://www.globalorgasm.org/
23 November 2006, on 3:27 pm
Stardust, Everyone
I hope you’ve seen this already.
http://beyondbelief2006.org/Watch/
If your limited for time, download session 10 and go to about 1 hr of the program. Neil Degrasse Tyson gives a great talk. Download the rest if you like that. This conference took place two weeks ago in San Diego at The Salk Institute. Many notables discussing all things aobut science. Dawkins, Harris, Ann Druyan, Tyson, And so many more.
Now this is something I can be truly thankful for.
23 November 2006, on 4:01 pm
Thanks for that link Jimmer! I am going to try to watch everything in order.