Another amusing “boy marries dog” story
19 February 2009 by Stardust
Just thought this little story would bring a chuckle or two.
Boy marries dog in India to ward off tiger attacks
BHUBANESWAR, India (Reuters) – An infant boy was married off to his neighbours’ dog in eastern India by villagers who said it will stop the groom from being killed by wild animals, officials and witnesses said Wednesday.
Around 150 tribes people performed the ritual recently in a hamlet in the state of Orissa’s Jajpur district after the boy, who is under two years old, grew a tooth on his upper gum.
The Munda tribe see such a growth in young children as a bad omen and believe it makes them prone to attacks by tigers and another animals. The tribal god will bless the child and ward off evil spirits after the marriage.
“We performed the marriage because it will overcome any curse that might fall on the child as well on us,” the boy’s father, Sanarumala Munda, was quoted as saying by a local newspaper.
The groom, Sagula, was carried by his family in procession to the village temple, where a priest solemnised the marriage between Sagula and his bride Jyoti by chanting Sanskrit hymns, a witness said.
The villagers then ate a feast with rich food and alcohol to celebrate.
The dog belongs to the groom’s neighbours and was set free to roam around the area after the ceremony. No dowry was exchanged, the witness said, and the boy will still be able to marry a human bride in the future without filing for divorce.
The last line, “the boy will still be able to marry a human bride in the future without filing for divorce” cracked me up.
Indian law does not recognise weddings between people and animals, but the ritual survives in rural and tribal areas of the country where millions are illiterate.
He won’t have to divorce his dog-bride because rational people realize that this is just superstition. I would say the more illiterate the weirder the religion, then I look at the educated Catholics and their ghoulish practices. 
19 February 2009, on 10:13 pm
At least the dog actually existed, unlike the putative husband of all the nuns.
19 February 2009, on 11:10 pm
How in the hell do they even hook up such stories? Did they used to marry kids off to monkeys or birds, but the kids were attacked later on? I wonder if they historically had a list of animals to try, and crossed them off the list each time, until someone finally managed to NOT have their child mauled. “So yeah, when I was two I married a dog. I know, I know, it sounds weird. But hey, it worked- No tigers attacked me, did they?”
It’s also kind of worrying when you consider how long dogs tend to live. He probably won’t even have hit puberty by that time- Will he then be considered a widower?
Okay. I should really stop trying to wrap my head around such a task as understanding ridiculous religious traditions. My head’s gonna hurt…
20 February 2009, on 1:37 am
Hmm I love to point out the simple fact that God spelled backwards is Dog. Good enough reason for a backward society as any. I guess.
20 February 2009, on 1:43 am
At least the dog actually existed, unlike the putative husband of all the nuns.
True, LOL!
“So yeah, when I was two I married a dog. I know, I know, it sounds weird. But hey, it worked- No tigers attacked me, did they?”
For some reason I can imagine Stewie saying those lines!
Hmm I love to point out the simple fact that God spelled backwards is Dog. Good enough reason for a backward society as any.
I love the way Eve writes god as DoG. (Do I have that right, Eve?)
20 February 2009, on 10:44 am
Congrats to the happy couple!
I’m sure there are times my hubby would rather be married to a dog. Dogs don’t argue with you.
20 February 2009, on 11:07 am
Lynda, ha! You crack me up. My husband has joked about that in the past.
I wonder what reasons and excuses they make up when the “marriage” doesn’t accomplish the goal? I mean what if the boy gets mauled or eaten by a tiger anyway? Will they make excuses that the child had evil inside him or what?
20 February 2009, on 12:19 pm
HAHAHA.
Amazing. Stupid people all arround us…
20 February 2009, on 2:03 pm
Yes, Star…will wonders never cease?
“The villagers then ate a feast with rich food and alcohol to celebrate.”
And of course, probably got totally bombed out of their gourds?
And…
“The dog belongs to the groom’s neighbors and was set free to roam around the area after the ceremony.”
Yeah…so everyone could enjoy watching the bride relieving “herself”…
and, of course, doing her appropriate crotch licking cleanup?
WTF!
ANFSCD ["And now for something COMPLETELY different"]…
Ummmm…just one of yesterday’s interesting factoidal articles?:
“Huge gamma-ray blast spotted 12.2 billion light-years from earth”
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20090219/sc_afp/sciencespaceastronomy
And those crazy…”Astrophysicists estimate there are hundreds of billions of GALAXIES!”
[Somehow I imagine hearing Carl Sagan saying "Billions".]
…and to the other extreme, there’s…
Flinstone Science’s Ken Ham…in the saddle of his “6000 year old”, animatronic, strictly vegetarian…dinosaur.
D’uh!
On that note, here’s an old classic bit by the late, great Bill Hicks.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hYDFkBxEa2I&feature=related
If only he knew there’d be another eight years of yet ANOTHER Bushie…adding way more agony to his 1993 comment about there having been 12 years of Fundies in the White House!
[If it weren't for the Internet, I'd probably never have known about, or be able to appreciate Bill Hicks.]
20 February 2009, on 2:15 pm
Did he promise to walk his new wife everyday and clean up after her?
20 February 2009, on 2:22 pm
^ ^ Sorry…this is the preferred Hicks clip I intended to post…
Christians Fundamentalists Creationists Bush -Bill Hicks:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R370YkYhV0w&feature=related
20 February 2009, on 2:29 pm
Did he promise to walk his new wife everyday and clean up after her?
Ewww. LOL!
20 February 2009, on 2:49 pm
Do Hindus not normally grow teeth from their gums? Am I to understand that the tooth was growing out sideways or was shaped like the Virgin Mary or something?
If I marry a tiger, will that ward off attacks by Hindu toddlers? Especially ones with sideways teeth?
20 February 2009, on 3:11 pm
Karen ^^ LMAO
I’m trying to understand the significance of the tooth. Weird, really weird!
20 February 2009, on 4:39 pm
The weird thing is, the sideways tooth is somehow evil but when the baby with two faces was born they thought it was holy.
20 February 2009, on 5:19 pm
Star
I’m trying to understand the significance of the tooth.
I wouldn’t try too hard. Might make your head asplodey. Me, I’m just grateful for a really good excuse (as if there were any bad ones) to marry me a tiger!
20 February 2009, on 5:29 pm
The weird thing is, the sideways tooth is somehow evil but when the baby with two faces was born they thought it was holy.
I would love to be a fly on a tree bark to hear how they come up with the rules for what’s evil or holy.
I’m just grateful for a really good excuse (as if there were any bad ones) to marry me a tiger!
Why do they always choose to marry dogs? I thought cows were sacred there? I’ve got me some research to do…and too much time on my hands.
22 February 2009, on 4:44 pm
The irony in all of this is that religious conservatives here in America claim that if you legalize same-sex marriage, then it will pave the way for people to marry animals as well, and yet in India, they haven’t legalized same-sex marriage and people are marrying animals anyway.